May 10, 2010
Dear Liannkath,
Good day to you! I read your page and I was inspired to tell you my experience regarding love problems I am now a first year college student. what happened to me happened when i was in high school.
"I had a crush on this lad since I was in first year high school. My heart beats for him when we first met in the road. I told myself to stop the foolishness. Yes, it stopped. Months passed by and I forgot him since I studied at different school. But a day came when i met him again with his friends. I started questioning myself who was that lad was.
" A year later, I knew that my cousin was a schoolmate of this lad I was talking about. Let us name the lad as John, my cousin as fretz. fretz lived in our house for a year because my mom promised my uncle to take care my cousin since she lived far from her school. In the first month of her stay in our house, i knew that a gal had a crush on John. and that gal was also my cousin. her name is mary. I haven't seen her for almost seven years since we left our old house.
" A month later, fretz told me that Mary and John was in a relationship . I was playing computer when she told me. I was in shock but i recovered fast. I told her, 'ok'. then i went back to my computer. Instead of playing, I played a song entitled, girlfriend. It doesn't mean that i hate my cousin nor i don't like her. It was just one of the most famous song at that time. after hearing the song, i went to my bedroom and there, i stayed for the whole night.
" i usually went to their school once every month just to see him. see how foolish i was? Even my mother wasn't able to stop me. well, that was before. months later, my mom saw a letter sent by her student. the letter said that john had a crush on me and that was the reason of the break up of his girlfriend. i was totally in shock. i didn't believe it. i was cracking a joke to my mom when she opened that topic. I went in the backyard and i told myself; 'no, that's not true. he can't be disloyal to his first love.'
"every time i met him, i just looked at my feet. i never looked at his eyes. Because if i do, my heart starts to beat faster and faster. it continued the same situation for many months. then, one day, i went to their school because my cousin told me to do so. that was three months later when we last met in a community celebration. we met again a week before our recognition. he had the confidence to ask me to be his friend. to avoid misunderstanding, i agreed to be his friend. we became text mates.
" A year later, i told him what i was feeling feeling for him. everybody expected that he felt the same way too. but we were wrong. he said, 'i'm sorry to hurt your feelings but i just treated you as my friend.' i was not in shock nor i was sad at the first time i read his message. well, it was only in sms. i was very happy that i knew his feelings towards me. but deep inside, i felt empty.
" days later and we both acted that nothing was happened, every time we saw each other, we smiled and say hi. then exchange messages like nothing had happened. it was wonderful.
"however, a month later, everything had change. he never texted me the way he used to do. he texted me few sms. then, i found out that he was very busy with his text mate. and i was deeply hurt. what will i do? will i still love him secretly or move on and let go of him? please do help me. i need your opinions to stop the bleeding of this heart.
THANK YOU!!
CINDY
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